Back in the old days, being smooth with the ladies meant having a kill switch installed under the dashboard of your car and flipping on a moonlit country road at the most opportune time. If you were not mechanically inclined you would just write a song espousing the glorious merits of your one-true-love. This is the kill switch on that song.
lyrics
You're a pretty girl I wonder how you would feel
about a ride with me in my automobile
I'm a gentlemen of that you shouldn't worry
I promised your father we'd be back by 8:30
Though you are lovely, I'll restrain myself
Here. Let me fasten your safety belt.
The road ahead is bumpy, hard and long
Ooh. Turn the wireless up. This is my favorite ludacris song
Mmm-hmmm in the moonlight I should say it's romantic
Let your hair down, no need to panic
I don't mind if you lean in nearer
Whoops. Oh my goodness, I've unhooked your braziere.
Chorus:
And that, my dear, is how I do it
Life is short, no time to waste
I promise on each and every car ride
that you and I will make it, well at least to second base
You're a pretty girl, you look hot... I mean in all those layers
What say you and I unburden you of your cares... and also your knickers
Not only for my sake, I know I'm a man, though
I just thought you'd be comfortable if we went commando
Oh my, you're lovely, nothing will ever come between us
Here, can you hold this? What is it? It's my penis
Chorus
Oh my dear, there won't be regretting
I wrote my master's thesis on heavy petting
Life's so short, well what do you say?
I think that I...... should service your vajayjay
Robins decided to release the recording of his 2016 comedy tour during the Covid-19 shutdown at the behest of fans. Bandcamp New & Notable May 29, 2020
Comedian Chris Gethard’s hilarious new surprise album is devoted to the great state of New Jersey, and the great state of New Jersey alone. Bandcamp New & Notable Dec 18, 2019
This dry, wry, gently absurdist comedian's first album is the inaugural release for Tig Notaro's new label, Bentzen Ball Records. Bandcamp New & Notable Jul 13, 2016